Papa’s House News & Updates

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

What is my life going to be about; what is it going to take for me to feel happy — I mean the happiness that involuntarily springs from my heart and courses through my veins? Is this something we should expect from life, something that will come at some point?

These are questions that started to haunt Palden Schmidt as he drove home each evening after a day of fulfilling the expectations of the advertising company that hired this rising star from Michigan State University with a fresh business degree. Palden at an early age had achieved many accolades and rewards for his efforts and had risen to a level of prosperity enviable to many, but though he had all the goods of success he still felt a little hollow.

Much to the disbelief of his colleagues, Palden submitted an application to the Peace Corps, and upon acceptance decided to leave the fast track and spend six months with us in Nepal before starting his Peace Corps assignment. We arranged for him to teach English and put together a boy’s basketball team at the Skylark School where our children attend. Unknown to me at the time Palden wasn’t sure if he even liked children; but he was ready to turn his life upside down and see what would happen.

Palden applied himself to his coursework in a practical and caring manner, always prepared and always available to his students; he encouraged his students to ask questions, rewarded them in fact to do so with his smile and appreciative answers. His classes became inspired conversations; at night when I would go to say goodnight to my children, they would say, “Did you know...” and then with the fervor of keepers of a newfound knowledge share with me what they learned that day. After school he took a group of boys, eager but undisciplined in the art of basketball, and built a solid team with heart for the game, boys who on occasion ended up beating the talented teams from schools with established basketball programs because they played with heart, with love for the game, and they never gave up. Palden gave 100% to the children at Skylark each day; on Saturdays and other non-school days he and the boys on the team would go for a long run and then practice together for many hours, the boys not wanting the day to end.

In Palden's last month he would often share with me his concern that time was running out and that he wasn’t sure how he would be able to leave. In his last week Palden started working on a speech that he wanted to give on his last day; in the mornings when I would see him before school, he revealed that he did not believe he would be able to deliver the speech, that while writing it he realized what the children had come to mean to him. On his last morning when I met Palden at the gate he was clearly torn; but when he entered the schoolyard and became swept up in the joyful mundane moments of the children he glowed again. This is the magic of these children.

At 1:30 an assembly was called and Palden gave his speech. He started off fine but then he left the prepared text and started talking about sharing each day with these children, and finding his life merging with theirs and awaking one morning and realizing the excitement he felt with the days beginning was the answer he had been looking for, he had found what happiness was, and the exhilaration keeping his happy heart pumping was something that no amount of money or fine cars would ever replace. At the back of the assembly 14 young boys quietly wept, so too the children from his classes who had been taught to ask questions and to think, and so did the principal and many of the teachers who Palden taught to find joy in teaching instead of simply dispensing information and formulas.

In Dhapasi, dusty slow Dhapasi where electricity is unavailable most of every day, where things are broken and water insufficient, where one is not insulated from heat or cold; where politics close schools and shops regularly, in Dhapasi far from skyscrapers and penthouses, clean water and air, entertainment and choices, Palden Schmidt found happiness springing from his heart and coursing through his veins.

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The children of Papa’s House play a lot of basketball; the girls in my house never tire of the game. One night Cila told me, “You know, Papa, the Head Mam’s sister was telling us today that the Skylark Hostel girls would beat us in a game of basketball, and I said I don’t think so, Mam.” When I asked why the Mam felt this way, she replied, “The Skylark hostel girls are bigger and more talented, she is telling us.” So I asked, “And what do you think, Cila, would it be fun to have a match against them and see?” And Cila just smiled her answer to me, her eyes dancing in images of her driving the lane. So it came to be; a date was made and the game would be held in front of all the school, prior to Palden's boys playing in the semi-final match in a local district school tournament. The children are all friendly, but there has been a small rivalry between the boarding students, sons and daughters of better off parents, and the children of Papa’s House since the first day we entered the school grounds. This was not created by us nor given energy by us, but in sports and academics the boarders have always had a little bit of an attitude of superiority.

I asked Sam Isherwood, one of our returning volunteers, if he and Vinod would try to teach the girls some rules of the game to get them ready, and so it was.

As game day approached we learned that the Skylark Hostel girls would have uniforms, so we tried to find matching t-shirts for our girls to wear. The girls without tennis shoes borrowed from others who had them.

Game day arrived. At lunch time with all our children around to wish them luck the team changed into their game clothes, and as a family we all walked back to school, 124 children strong.

Entering into the school grounds, I was surprised to see the size of the audience and the formality under which the game would be played. Our girls noticed that one of the players suited up for the game had graduated the year before and was currently playing college ball. They asked what I thought and I said, "It doesn’t matter; she is one girl, you are a family, go and have some fun." And they did. They didn’t talk much before the game or during it, they never complained about referee calls, they never got rattled or angry. They played for each other and for us on the sidelines; they out hustled, out shot, and out passed the Skylark hostel in a very lopsided display of what a family can do.

Christmas at Papa’s House this year was better than ever. With each passing year the children get more enthused about the songs to be sung, the decorations to be made, the tree to bring out and decorate on a Saturday morning, and the making of small gifts for each other's secret Santa. They share stories of Christmases past, of watching a Christmas film the night before and going to bed trying to sleep with one eye open as Papa instructed; and the waking to stockings bulging with fruits and candy.

This year we had many volunteers who wanted to return from their placements in time to be with our family for Christmas. The volunteers really made things special, from the storing of 135 metal boxes and all the gifts to be packaged in them taking up space in their home, to rising at 3:30 on Christmas morning and delivering the boxes in the biting cold and dark and spreading them on the large grounds of Papa’s Harmony House; they smilingly produced. Sirkka Turkki from Finland was here for her second time, and in addition to many beautiful garments she also made 135 stockings for the children, real Santa-type stockings large enough to challenge the filling of them.

On the last Saturday before Christmas Sangita Darji took out the Christmas tree, and with a little help, beautifully decorated it behind closed curtains in our dining room while children outside eagerly sought out small openings in the curtains to see what she was doing.

“We Wish You a Merry Christmas” and “Dashing Through the Snow” echoed from hallways and inside rooms. Many questions from our newer children about Christmas and who Jesus was were fielded by older children, and the idea of celebrating the birth of the Christian God settled easily with them and helped make some sense out of “Oh Little Town of Bethlehem,” the words of which they had learned. All the songs sung in English with their thick Nepali accents were patently hysterical and touching at the same time to hear.

Anita and Vinod, the managers of Imagine and Possibilities Houses, were helping their children to keep a secret from the rest of us. The children on their own accord had decided to put on a Christmas pageant with a play they wrote, directed, and acted in, as well as dancing and athletic performances. The play was about the life of a Kamlari, from being sold, to working for cruel people, to being rescued and moved into Papa’s House.

It was a very moving tribute to all of you who have made their lives safe and full of hope.

Christmas and other religious holidays were recognized by the Nepali government this year, and each religion's holy days are shared days off by the people of Nepal. In accordance a new multi-storied shopping center celebrates Christmas in a big way, with a beautiful tree and visits by “Santa” and other universally recognized characters. We took our children in small groups to see all of this as part of what will now become more of our Christmas tradition.

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Our children are doing well in school, with about 30% receiving top scores; 50% pulling Bs and Cs; and the remaining 20% having a difficult time learning the new language in which all their classes are taught. Most of our children missed out on several years of school but have shown that desire is a great equalizer. The school year starts and ends in April, and we are pretty certain that all will pass with everyone doubling down in their final term’s effort.

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Valentine's Day felt different this year, as our girls and boys are getting older. A week before February 14th the children filled all their free time in the making of Valentine's cards and creating paper flowers and hearts. They expressed their affection for their closest brothers and sisters and staff alike. Small hands painstakingly serrated the edges of a piece of construction paper upon which they glued a photo of a film star or model cut from the newspaper and wrote, "Happy Valentines Day Papa, I Love You"; the smallest of children with big hearts wanting so much to share, to express what it is they feel in their hearts when all the talk is over; and older teenage boys and girls with serious cards ending with “I love you… thanks Papa”; two words that give meaning to life.

A family’s story is that of a million mundane moments shared; ours is epic.

To our many supporters I pass on what is rightfully yours: “I love you… thanks, Papa.”